# 131 THE SILVER JUBILEE—8TH SEPTEMBER 2019—SUNDAY—YEAR # 25 !!! 「あぜりあ」本八幡・西船橋・津田沼・佐倉
TO EVERYONE IN JAPAN WITH ALL MY LOVE !!!!
THE SILVER JUBILEE—8TH SEPTEMBER 2019—SUNDAY—YEAR # 25 !!!
Twenty-five years is a long time. But I did not truly realize just how long it was, until now. Until tonight. It was twenty-five years ago tonight at 8:45 P.M. that I became a widow.
I was 45.
I was also the youngest widow in my apartment complex and, as time slowly passed, the longest widowed woman of all my friends. I was almost like the expert. My daughter-in-law just became a widow two years ago, when she was 68. It was I who had to try to explain just how hard YEAR ONE without her David would be. Cause I have been there. I did not know myself how hard YEAR ONE would be until it came to pass for me.
Being a widow is NOT easy.
Especially if you have been married for years and years.
But I went through Year One…..and it hurt big. REAL BIG. So did years two, three, and four. And five. My Tony died back in 1994. I travelled to Honolulu to Punchbowl twice a month for four years. Then it got too expensive to go. And I miss going. I still miss going. I wanted to be at my Tony’s grave today. But I couldn’t go. It is way too hard for me to travel alone now. I would never make it to the grave-site. And besides, I still cry. At Year Thirteen I was still crying. Now, I am doing better. But I still Miss him. Love him. Wish he was here. And I always will, I am sure of that. My love for my Tony will not change. It will only grow deeper. That is what it is doing for me
It is growing stronger.
The Holidays and his Birthday are the hardest times for me. And I do mean ALL The Holidays. And he’s NOT coming back. I know this. He’s NOT…..even when on some nights or mornings, I dream otherwise.
But I will see my Dear Tony one day……
That is for sure a solid deal.
We WILL be together again.
In God’s Time.
I MISS YOU DARLING !!!